Book Review - Mixed - My Life in Black and White

"I hate covert racism. I always hated guessing whether someone is being mean/rude/nervous because they hate my race or because they are having a bad day. As I got older, I noticed that covert racism is like depression: You know it when you feel it, but it's hard to explain to someone who has never experienced it. It's like a sixth sense that God has given people of color that white people don't believe in. We just know."

In her memoir "Mixed: My Life in Black and White" (2006), Angela Nissel writes of the struggles she faces while growing up biracial. Nissel's name may be familiar to fans of the NBC comedy series "Scrubs." She has been a staff writer for the show for four years and is now consulting producer. As a starving artist (a.k.a. freelance writer), Nissel sold some goods on eBay for extra cash. The winning bidder for one of those items was a television executive who had read her first book "The Broke Diaries" (2001), which was about her days as a broke college student. The eBay winner introduced Nissel to a television literary agent who sent copies of "The Broke Diaries" to shows hiring comedy writers. Nissel had numerous job offers, but chose "Scrubs."

Her knack for sarcastic, quick-witted humor that is a driving force in "Scrubs" is what makes "Mixed" a must read. When Nissel is in the fourth grade, two of her classmates, Jimmy and Michael, call her a zebra. (That isn't the humorous part.) Nissel's father finds out and goes to the boys' houses with Angela. Jimmy's parents scold their son. However, Michael's father slams the door in Angela's father's face. That father's dog has been using the Nissels' yard as a bathroom, so Angela's father concocts a hilarious scheme involving an Ex-Lax pill. Angela asks her father whether the Ex-Lax will hurt the dog. "'No, just Michael's father's carpets,'" her dad replies.

Later, though, Angela discovers that her father has been cheating on her mother, but even this situation is steeped in humor. "I already knew my parents were having problems and she suspected my father of cheating. (Note to parents: Trying to have cryptic conversations by spelling words out no longer works once your child is reading.) Then later, "Ever since the first argument about my father c-h-e-a-t-i-n-g with w-h-o-r-e-s, my mother had started working a lot...."

The thing about this book is that the comedic moments are also sad ones. And this is Nissel's strength: She makes you laugh, but she also makes you think. Comments from people about her looks teach her that there is "good" hair and an "ugly" nose. The features people consider pretty are from her white father.

She went to all-black schools, all-white schools, public, private, schools associated with different religions-yet she never fit in. She was never white enough or black enough, so she was the target of merciless teasing. "Being a mixed child, you get used to people staring at you," she writes. She immediately follows with humor: "I learned that rolling my eyes or sticking out my tongue was the quickest way to get people to avert their gazes." She learns that being biracial is no easier in the dating world. She notices that of six black male coworkers at a production company, "five had white wives and one was dating an Asian girl."

The book is filled with Nissel's struggles, but she doesn't want you to feel sorry for her; she is explaining how her experiences (good or bad) made her who she is. She makes you care about the people in her life, particularly her mother, who let her daughter change schools and religions-almost as often as she changed her clothes-in an attempt to find herself. Nissel doesn't censor herself-or anyone else-which makes for brilliant dialogue and unapologetic honesty.

http://www.whitneybrennan.info

Grief Recovery Handbook

Is Jesus the Only Way to Heaven? - The Good People Get to Go to Heaven Also

I found a website that was recommended to me and it had the comment, is Jesus the only way to heaven at, Gotquestions, seems like your typical Christian website that replies with biblical quotes and simple to follow information. If I was lost, they will help me find a way. There's even a button at the bottom that states, I have accepted Christ today. I guess if I was to push that button, I get to go to heaven and be with Jesus. Hard to imagine, avoiding a life of burning in hell could be as simple as pushing a button and uttering a few simple words.

I found this question and began reading their comment. The first comment is from somebody answering as a nonbeliever in Christianity. It states something like, if I'm basically a good person and live a moral life, I get to go to heaven, right, only the bad people like murderers go to hell.

Now the answer that the website gives, seems to create fear if you do not belong to Christianity and provide you with hope if you join the group.

It mentioned Satan as the ruler of the world, and he can plant these thoughts into your head if you're not a Christian. He also controls your mind and let's you believe, that it would only make sense to any rational person, they get to go to heaven if they're good.

Now this is what makes sense to me but according to this information, I am doomed to rot in hell for eternity, even if I am a pretty good person. All I have to do is accept Christ as God and I get to go to heaven. That seems pretty easy and I wonder why more people don't do it. Just push the button.

I wonder if Satan is controlling, non-Christians minds and that's why there's brutality and war throughout the world. If everyone was a Christian, would our world be better.

Here's a quote from Wikipedia The Crusades were a series of religion-driven military campaigns waged by much of Christian Europe against external and internal opponents. Crusades were fought mainly against Muslims, though campaigns were also directed against pagan Slavs, Jews, Russian and Greek Orthodox Christians, Mongols, Cathars, Hussites, Waldensians, Old Prussians, and political enemies of the popes.

These Christian Crusades killed thousands of people. To give you an idea how many people were killed, all I had to do was type the word crusades into a search engine and it took me to the Christian Crusades.

I guess that rules that out, it seems like the Christians a long time ago were pretty aggressive towards their enemies, I wonder if most Christians would refer to these people as enemies today or are they just being controlled by Satan. Do these Christians from the Crusades get to go to heaven? If people like this get to go to heaven, may be hell is a better place anyway.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development. Check out one of his recommended books, Mere Christianity

Here's something to think about, go to heaven

Education Leads To Success

Change Our Thoughts to Change Our Lives

We learned in science that objects and our bodies are comprised of atoms which are in constant motion. Matter vibrates. If the motion increases, the state of the object changes. Ice is heated to water. Water is heated to steam. Light, heat, and electricity vibrate. Colors form a spectrum from red to violet. As the pulsation increases, the colors shift from red to orange to yellow to green to blue to violet. All energies move and shift. We energy; we are vibrations.

What is true of our physical bodies is also true of our mental states. Just as physical objects modify their state, such as water to steam and lights from red to orange, our thoughts adjust. Thoughts are vibrations. We can stimulate our ideas and move them to a higher state, or we can lower them and become caught in negative emotions. We change. How we do that is our choice.

A practical spirituality teaches us that we can't cling to old ideas or patterns that are no longer useful or positive. We can think better thoughts. We can think higher thoughts. Our emotions are influenced by people around us. While we may not sense, observe or describe the differences as vibrations, we are aware that some people are more uplifting. Others bring us down.

We choose those who surround us. We choose which thoughts and emotions dominate our lives. Each mental or emotional state has its own rate of vibration. We can transform that rate at will and maintain a mental calm, unaffected by the opinions around us. Negative beliefs do not have to alter our positive state. We manage our thoughts. We do not have to get caught in the up and down drama of family, friends and associates.

Our challenge is to rise above the normal, material thoughts and be more positive, more evolved, and more spiritual.

Cheryl A. Chatfield, Ph.D. is a writer, teacher and inspirational speaker. This article is an excerpt from her recent Do It Yourself Guide To Spirituality: Seven Simple Steps . Visit http://NottInstitute.org to download and read this 40-page booklet, or to receive a free monthly Practical Spirituality Newsletter. The Nottingham Institute is a nonprofit organization that promotes material for an everyday, practical spirituality for people who don't find answers in traditional religions.

Religious Freedom

The Religious Background of Unicorn Tapestries

The unicorn has been a mythical symbol since ancient times. Some of the earliest depictions of the unicorn are from ancient China and featured a creature resembling a large horse with a single horn protruding from its forehead. The writings and drawings of many ancient cultures throughout Asia and Europe included unicorns and eventually they evolved into religious symbols.

By the middle ages, the unicorn was considered both a religious and secular symbol by most of Christian Europe. The unicorn represented chastity, holiness, and purity, and was even used as a symbol for Christ. Because of the unicorn's important symbolism, it was often featured in tapestries and other art of the period. There are even references to unicorns in the bible, although some historians question their inclusion in the Bible because of translations issues. References to unicorns can be seen in Deuteronomy 33:17, Psalm 22:21, 29:6 and 92:10; Numbers 23:22 and 24:8; and Isaiah 34:7. These passages do not infer that the references to unicorns are fictitious or that unicorns are not in fact real animals.

There are many examples of medieval art and tapestries that feature unicorns and once they were accepted as a religious symbol they became very popular subjects. Unicorns represented purity and the myth perpetuated by their holy meaning was that only a virgin could tame a unicorn. Tapestries were common among the aristocracy in the Middle ages and were used as decoration as well as insulation for windows and openings. The most common tapestry designs were biblical allegories including unicorns. One of the most famous sets of tapestries are the Lady and the Unicorn tapestries, Created in France in the late 1400's.

The Lady and the Unicorn tapestries are perhaps the most famous examples of unicorns in art in the entire world. They were not discovered until late in the 1800's by Proper Merimee in a castle in Boussac France. They were damaged but were later restored and then put on display in the Cluny Museum in France in a room specially designed to house them. The novelist Georges Sands was responsible for making them so popular and included them in her writings.

It is not known who designed and wove the Lady and the Unicorn tapestries, but historians do know who they were created for. The coat of arms on the tapestries belongs to the Le Viste family and the tapestries were probably created for this family in the late 1400's. Like other tapestries and art depicting unicorns, the Lady and the Unicorn tapestries are said to represent the human senses with the subject of the tapestries a virginal maiden and a unicorn. Five of the six tapestries represent the five senses, hearing, tough, taste, feeling, and sight. The sixth tapestry is one that carries some debate as some say it represent love, other think it stands for the "6th sense" while other think it represents understanding or empathy. Unicorns have long been a part of art and folk lore, and are still symbols of holiness and purity today.

http://www.touchoftapestry.com/servlet/StoreFront

Norman Vincent Peal

Enhancing Your Self-Image

Success is an inside job. Even if your body and mind are ready, willing, and able to learn and do whatever is necessary to get the job done, a negative self-image may stop you.

Although we create many outward images of ourselves-so we can interact with or impress others and sell our ideas or services-we only have one self-image. The way we view ourselves determines the level of success we attain in anything. To achieve more success, some parts of our sense of self will have to change.
Your inward impression of yourself controls much of what you create in your life. When someone says, "Good morning, how are you?" you probably answer, "Fine," regardless of any troubles you may be having. The image you project is often very different from your true sense of self.

Because your level of success and happiness is controlled by your interior self-image, you must try to ensure that your exterior image and your interior image are in sync. If you can't match your self-worth with your exterior image, your ability to achieve at the highest levels will be restricted.

Try this exercise. Put the palms of your hands together with the fingers aligned as if in prayer. These hands pressing gently together represent you. Now twist your wrists, keeping your hands together, until the back of your right hand is facing away from your face. The right hand with its back facing out is the side of you that you want and allow the world to see. In fact, you present it to the world all the time. You put your best foot forward. It is the side of you that is happy, fine, capable, reliable, strong, honest, trustworthy, caring, sensitive, and thoughtful. This is your positive side.

Your left hand is the one only you can see. It's the side of you that isn't so good. This is the side of you that's not strong, that is lonely or hurting, that has faults, is afraid, unhappy, easily angered, and not confident. This is your not-so-positive side.

Which side is the real you-the positive side or the not-so- positive side? The truth is, you are both. One side does not negate the other. Just because you have faults, failures, or insecurities doesn't negate the fact that you have strengths, wonderful attributes, and abilities to get things done. Yet most people tend to let their not-so- positive side reduce the strengths on the positive side. They focus on the not-so-good side of themselves, saying, "I know I'm a good person, but . . . ."

If the image you have of yourself consists of only undistinguished and unexceptional qualities-or all the things you are not-then your self-image is discrediting your positive attributes. You can be-and in fact are-both at the same time. For example, if you get a pimple on your nose, isn't that all you see when you look in the mirror? Even though the rest of your face is just fine, you worry about the one blemish. But your pimple does not negate the wonderfulness of all your other features.

You can choose to put the not-so-positive side into proper perspective by no longer making it your focus. Once you have the right perspective, you are free to see all the good things about yourself. You can see that you have a profusion of strengths and abilities.

When people operate from the not-sa-positive side, they give themselves negative labels, saying, "I don't really have what it takes," or 'Tm not cut out for this." Often these labels are not true, but if they are your truth, a negative self-image results and affects your confidence, performance, and happiness.

To better understand how both sides are valuable to you, try another exercise. Put your hands in front of your chest, as if praying. Press them together as hard as you can, having someone hold your wrists at the same time. Now have them quickly pull your hands apart, moving one hand toward yourself and the other toward your partner. No matter how strong you are, or how hard you try, you will not be able to keep your hands together. Just as you are weak in trying to hold your hands together, you will be weakened if you consider your inner and outer selves as two separate beings.

Try this exercise again, this time interlocking your fingers. In this position, your hands cannot be pulled apart-you are strong now. As you can see, our weaknesses can actually make us stronger. Weaknesses tend to make us more humble and teachable. If you can believe that a weakness is truly a gift from God, then you must also believe that God will show you your weakness and make it your strength.

As a child, my weakness was my cowardice. That weakness prompted me to excel at karate. My lack of self-esteem as a young boy living on the Navajo reservation was one reason I decided to become a professional speaker and help others-so I could feel better about myself. My weaknesses have made me stronger.

If you are prone to take charge of a job and do it well, you are most likely driven by a weakness. This weakness could be a feeling of inferiority that makes you go out of your way to do well. Your feelings of inadequacy may cause you to be a top performer. In order to control the outcome, you have to take charge. Perhaps you have a need to be noticed, praised, or acknowledged that causes you to excel.

I know many people who appear to be very strong-they look and act like confident, make-it-happen, take-charge people. They get the job done, reach out to others, and are there to help whenever they can. Many are known for their caring hearts. But if they stop helping others, they feel empty and much of their joy goes away. On the surface, they seem fine, but inside they just aren't happy. For these people, helping others is like getting an emotional fix. They must help others to feel okay inside.

When I ask, "Who takes care of you?" I frequently hear, "No one." Such people feel lonely and are either unaware of their need to be taken care of or try to ignore it and meet their needs by helping others. Often the reason they reach out to others is because they know how bad it feels not to be taken care of. Because of our weaknesses-or needs-we feel powerful or compassionate, but we can still be left searching for our own happiness. When we are just givers, our own emotional resources quickly become drained.

By Jack M. Zufelt
"Mentor To Millions"
Jack M. Zufelt is a bestselling author and has achieved worldwide recognition for teaching people the true cause of all achievement. His life's mission is to impart the truth about-and dispel the myths surrounding-success and achievement.

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